What Can I Do to Make It Better??

"I went into the woods because I wanted to live deliberately. I wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life...to put to rout all that was not life; and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived."~Henry David Thoreau

I stole this quote from another blog, Keepint it Off, and it is excatly what I needed to read today. I am sitting here at my job - putting label after label on envelopes that will be sent out to customers with an advertistement stuffed inside and all I can think is - Is this it? Is this my life? Sitting at a job I hate day in and day out - going home cooking dinner, sitting in front of the tv, putting the kids to bed at 8:00 pm, running on the treadmill, taking a shower, going to bed and then getting up and repeating this exact same schedule monday - friday. The weekends are grocery shopping, laundry, grass cutting ... I definitely think if I died today I just might have the feeling that I have not lived ...

I've always been the one to play it safe, to stay in my comfort zone and NEVER take a risk. Hell I will avoid a roller coaster at all cost because they scare the shit out of me - but I have gone on a few kicking and screaming.

Stick with What Works ..

So I am really pissed at myself for letting things get away from me - I was doing so good when I started off in February, dropping weight steadily. Then we went on our "staycation" in June and I took a week off and all hell broke loose. I have had the hardest time getting back on track. Thankfully, I think I am finally back to where I should be. Over the weekend I stepped on the scale and saw a very scary number - 180!! I promised myself I would never go back to the 180's again. The only good thing that came out of seeing that number was it put the fear of fatness into me! I got my butt back in to gear; went grocery shopping and bought a bunch of healthy foods, did some meal planning and got back on the treadmill. I stepped on the scale this morning and saw 174.

It's so funny I've tried diet after diet and they never work!! For a few days yes but then they get old and I go back to my old ways. This time I have found what really, truly works for me! Counting calories and exercise - I just have to stick to what I know works!!! If I would have done that, think of how far I could have been by now ... I can't do that though, I can't change what is already done. All I can do is get back to eating right, exercising and taking care of myself! If something is working and you feel great, then don't stray from it! Stick with it - it's not always going to be easy and you are going to want to quit - but you have to look at the big picture and know that if you just hang in there the end result will be worth every skipped brownie, every drop of sweat, every bottle of water ... It will be worth it all!!

I am so glad I didn't let the scale defeat me, so glad I got back on track and I will NOT see 180 EVER AGAIN on my scale!!  =)

Stick to what you know works - and kick some ass!!!

Why Not Me ???

So I haven't been blogging but I've been a crazy lurker on other blogs - basically because I've had nothing good to blog about and I am still not fully on track. Today after reading story after story of weight loss success and people just finally getting with it and doing what's best for them and changing their lives..  It's like a friggin light bulb went off ... I sit here day in and day out and I watch other people make their dreams come true, I see other people make healthy decisions, I see other people post weight loss after weight loss - and I think wow, that is awesome, if only I could be one of "them" ... Well,  hello dumb ass! - You CAN!!! ..

Why Not Me?!?! ... seriously, its getting old putting things off - not running tonight because this or that happened and I just don't feel like it - eating crap because the house isn't stocked with the best foods at the moment - putting off one more friggin day of things I CAN do today if I just got off my butt and did it!

There is no reason I can't be a "success story" - there is no reason I can't take the phrase "results not typical" and shred it to bits and get my own kick ass results!

I am going to do this! I am going to transform my body and I am going to know what it feels like to be the best me! Inside and out! ... I'm tired of the execuses.. I'm tired of watching everyone else succeed and wishing that little ole poor me could do it also ... It's time!

And if you're still reading after my repeat of - enough of enough posts - thank you! It's gonna get better, I promise!

Why do you have bubbles on your leg??

Ha Ha!! I love kids, I love their honesty and how they don't sugar coat anything! Sometimes it can be a little embarrasing and even hurtful but sometimes the truth hurts! ... Yesterday we had all just woken up and we were getting ready for the day and I was still in my pajamas (a t-shirt and underwear, it was HOT!) ... I was standing at the kitchen counter and my 4 year old walks up and points to my upper leg and says "Mom - do you see that! Why do you have bubbles on your leg???" I kind of laughed and then told him, that's the fat mommy is trying to get rid of when she is running on the treadmill!! ... Ha ha! ... He was very amazed and didn't really know what to think of it all. Poor kid! ha ha ... all I can do is laugh because eventually it will be gone, but at this point in time, it is what it is :)

So yesterday I got an awesome workout cutting the grass - I was completely soaked with sweat by the time I was done - it has been 100+ here the past few days and we had put off cutting the grass as long as we could. I honestly don't think I have ever sweated that much, but it felt good!! I have a VERY hilly back yard and it is huge - took me an hour to the front and backyard and when I was done I was so sore I could barely move - I love that feeling :)

I have decided to start making some mini-goals. I have been reading some blogs with others who are doing this and it seems to help breaking things up and not having this HUGE goal to reach. I am 174 today, ultimately I want to weigh 135 by the time I am 30 (June 27, 2012) ... just a personal goal of mine, I want to see myself at that weight and I want to just have the accomplishment of reaching it. I will be happy at 145 but I want to prove to myself that if I really want something bad enough I can do it ... So anyways, back to smaller goals. My first small goal is to be 160 by September 5th (Labor Day) ... that is 8 weeks away. 14 pounds in 8 weeks would be 1.75 lbs/week ... I can do that!  This would also be 33 lbs lost total! After this I will set another mini goal - and so on until I reach my ultimate goal of 135.

So stay tuned - watch me shrink and meet each goal..... Now I just need to think of some rewards for each goal I meet!!

What about you? Do you set mini goals? What are your rewards??

I'm Baaaaaack! =)

Well I am back and back to stay this time!! =) No more breaks until I am at goal!!! Period.

I got back on the treadmill tonight - it felt great and it felt awful all at the same time. I was huffin' and puffin' ... my lungs were burnin' like crazy but I felt so good afterwards. I only did 2 miles tonight and that took me 26 minutes!! Not so great but I gotta get back into the swing of things.

Here I am post-run - sweat and all =)

I tracked my food today as well - not the best, like I said I have to get back into the swing of things. I was starving all day! Not sure what was up with that. So I ate a little more than I wanted while I was waiting for dinner to be done. But I burned 420 calories on the treadmill so I feel good about it. My goal is to stick between 1200 - 1300 calories and track every bite!

So I have a new fast food addiction - but its a healthy one =)  Have you tried the Chicken Thai Salad at Panera Bread - OMG I want to have it's baby! It is so friggin good. I was telling my co-worker about it and that I was going to get one and she said would you get me one too, and she had the same thoughts. It has a kick to it and it is huge and the best part of all its only 380 calories for the WHOLE thing!!!

Would you just look at it!!

Try it now! You will NOT be disappointed!

Ok, I gotta go for now - more tomorrow. It's late and that treadmill wore me out! Hope you are all doing great - excited to be back in the mix =)

Game Plan ...

Ok - I've done a lot of thinking and I am ready to get back into this thing ... I've had enough "time off" and I am ready to kill it and get this weight off.

So here is what I have come up for some guidelines that I want to/will follow:

1. Eat 1200 - 1300 calories daily
2. Record EVERYTHING I eat and count calories
3. Drink at least 8 glasses of water a day - hopefully more
4. Exercise 5 - 6 days a week, some kind of exercise no matter what is is, at least 30 Mins a day.

I have to have guidelines, that is just the kind of person I am - I have to have some kind of structure. I want to follow this and I want to follow it to a T until I am at my goal weight. I am at 172 now, I want to be 135 by the time I am 30 - June 27, 2012 ... I have plenty of time and if I stick to it I will be at my goal way before that.

I am giving myself this weekend to just relax and get my stuff together, I plan on making a trip to the farmer's market to stock up on some fruit and veggies - and I also plan on having 2 bbq's and I just don't want to have to worry about the calories this weekend - I plan on having a few drinks sunday to celebrate my bday that was earlier this week and I need some serious relaxing and enjoying a good time - so this will all start next week... I am ready to get back into this. I told the husband last night that I have to get back to caring about myself again - not doing so has made me feel like complete crap.

Thanks to all of you for sticking with me through my craziness of my "Funk" ... It's time to wake up and take care of business!! =)

Have a GREAT 4th of July - my husband is like a kid on the night before Christmas ... waiting to let off his fireworks ... I am personally just ready for some Beer-B-Que =)